HEAR ME OUT BEFORE YOU GO IN!
By now, we've all seen the viral first-date video where a woman would not leave her date's car to go to The Cheesecake Factory. If you're not familiar, let me bring you up to speed:
A first-date couple is on their way to dinner. The gentleman, Jay, who is parking, gets out of the car to open the door for the woman, Alicia. Then Alicia begins to record the date on her phone and then locks the door, preventing Jay from opening her door. Jay is puzzled. He asks, "Would you like me to open the door for you? Alicia doesn't respond. Jay then asks, "Are you recording me?" She says yes, "This is The Cheesecake Factory. This is the Cheesecake Factory y'all. Jay asks, "What's wrong with that?" To which Alicia replies, "This is a chain restaurant. Who takes someone who looks like this to a chain restaurant?" Needless to say, Jay ended the date and took Alicia home.
BACK STORY: Jay made dinner reservations for 4:00 p.m. for Aria's in Manhattan, a restaurant that met Alicia's approval. Alicia was running late, and they both missed their 4:00 p.m. reservation. As a backup, an hour later, Jay took Alicia to The Cheesecake Factory, which did not meet Alicia's approval.
I'M GOING TO STOP RIGHT THERE!
Since the infamous Cheesecake Factory video, men and women have been creating a list of the type of person they're looking for in a first date and or mate. Some of these lists, in my opinion, are downright stupid. Nevertheless, they are someone's idea of an ideal situation. But why? Why do we need lists at all? When it comes to dating, why do we need the validation of public opinion or social media?
Ladies, what are your expectations for your first date? Was Alicia behaving entitled? Is our worth or value determined by where we choose to eat? Are we trying to measure up to an idea of what we're supposed to be or have? What's wrong with The Cheesecake Factory?
BUT I AINT GOING TO THE CHEESECAKE FACTORY EITHER!
The Cheesecake Factory is not a bad first date for some people. In my opinion, chain restaurants tend to lean towards families, work luncheons, and happy hour. I prefer a small, intimate, and cozy restaurant for a first date. Where I feel my date and I can get more acquainted. My first date with "Connecticut Bae" was to Caridad & Louis's Restaurant on Gun Hill Rd, in the Bronx. It was early afternoon, it wasn't crowded, and it felt like we had all the time in the world to get to know each other. Hands down, it was one of the best dates I ever had.
DATING IS NOT ONE SIZE FITS ALL
I say this all the time. There's no rule book when it comes to dating. There's no such thing as one size fits all when it comes to dating either. Don't, get me started on these YouTube videos and podcasts! You have to find what works for you. It's a simple conversation. As soon as your date asks, "What type of food do you like?", that is your opportunity to let them know your preferences. Do you see that? Easy. Don't complicate things. If your choice of restaurants determines your worth you may have some self-evaluating to do.